Tuesday, November 08, 2005

My Fiction Best Write

Alyx opened the door to her apartment and looked around to see if Marie was in. Looking in the mirror on the back of the door she looked in the mirror to see how she looked in her black leather pants with purple and red ribbons intertwined. While she thought she looked good in them they were no where near as hot as the red crushed velvet corset with the purple trim and lacing.
Walking to the left to the kitchen she dropped her coat and purse on the table. Looking at the clock she noticed it was quarter to two in the morning. As she opened the door to the refrigerator to grab a water bottle she spotted the phone. Seeing the message light blinking Alyx grabbed the water and picked up the phone and dialed the answering machine and put in her password.
" You have two new messages."
" Hey Alyx this is Eva I’m calling to tell you that when I get done with work I’m going to stop over. See ya later."
" To delete press seven…"
Beep.
"Next message"
" Hey Alyx this is Marie I’m going to be home late tonight so don’t wait up. I have a date. Bye"
" To delete press seven..."
Beep.
"First skipped message."
" Marie this is Jak… Um… Are we still on for tonight? If so I’ll pick you up at seven p.m. . Dress nice, cause we’re going out to eat and then going clubbing and then maybe go for a walk. Bye Marie"
" To delete press seven..."
Beep.
Crashing down to the floor, Alyx threw the phone at the wall. Wiping the tears off her face from hearing the message she screamed" A boy I am crying over a frickin’ boy. Who is going out on a date with my roommate? A frickin’ boy. Frick I just broke the phone. Now I’m talking to myself. Great I’m going crazy."
Alyx was picking up the pieces of the phone and throwing them in the garbage can when she noticed the mail on the floor next to the door of the living room almost like someone had thrown them at the table and missed in their haste. Finishing picking up the phone she grabbed her water bottle and picked the mail off the floor and put it in her purse on her way to the bathroom to fix her makeup. Deciding not to let the message get to her she walked into the bathroom and grabbed her makeup bag and started washing her face to get any trace of tears off. When she finished she walked over to the radio next to the shower and pressed the play button and blasting out was Opeth.
~ Out on the road there are fireflies circling Deep in the woods, where the lost souls hide Over the hill there are men returning Trying to find some peace of mind. ~
Smiling at the song she listened to it while she applied her mascara.
~ Sleep my child ~
Finished with her mascara she looked through her make-up bag for her red eyeliner and purple glitter. Finding them she starts to apply the eyeliner.
~ Speak to me now and the world will crumble Open a door and the moon will fall All of your life, all your memories Go to your dreams, forget it all ~
Almost done with her make-up she hears the start of a new Opeth song.
~ In the corner beside my window There hangs a lonely photograph There is no reason I'd never notice a memory that could hold me back ~
While she finishes with the small touches of purple glitter at the corners of her eyes and a little glitter on her chest. She starts to nod to the song looking in the mirror she smiles. Seeing this beautiful girl with violet eyes and hair down to her butt staring back at her.
~ There is a wound that's always bleedingThere is a road I'm always walking And I know you'll never return to this place ~
Walking to her room across from the bathroom she walked straight to her bed and sat down to grab her book from the nightstand and heard the next verse of the song she cringed at the way it hit close to home.
~ Gone through days without talking There is a comfort in silence So used to losing all ambition Struggling to maintain what's left ~
Grabbing her Black, Red, and Purple ankle boots she walked down the hall into the living room to sit and read her book. Listening to the song she sat down on the couch facing the window to the terrace.
~ And once undone, there is only smoke Burning in my eyes to blind To cover up what really happenedForce the darkness unto me ~
Waiting for her sister to show up Alyx was staring out the terrace to the street with an unnoticed book in her hand. Hearing the song Closure come on she realized that she had reached closure in just doing what she had to, to get cleaned up. She worked through things by removing the remains of the affect he had on her and put up her true self.
~ Heal myself-a feather on my heartLook inside-there never was a startPeel myself-dispose of severed skinAll subsides-around me and within ~
If Jak could not realize what a beautiful, honest, caring, person she was then he was not worth her time.
~ There's nothing painful in thisThere's no upheavalRedemption for my pathosAll sins undone ~
A small smile on her face as she stared out the window across the terrace. Looking across the city she turned away and picked up her book and sat down on the terrace with the view of the city in front of her.
~ Awaiting word on what's to comeIn helpless prayers a hope lives onAs I've come clean I've forgotten what I promisedIn the rays of the sun I am longing for the darkness ~
As she looked back to her book her sister Eva walked into the apartment looking sassy in her black leather skirt and a blue silk halter top. Walking past the kitchen Eva sets her purse down and states "Dad and Mercedes are debating on trying on a third child."
"Eva," Alyx says as she sets down her book. "Jacob can't even give his four kids any attention. He gives all his attention to his wife and money, mostly money." Standing up and walking over to the window she said, "Why should they try to have a third child together? He already plans on giving the business to either you or to Jacob most likely Jacob."
Eva walked over to Alyx and put her hand on her shoulder. "Alyx I get the fact that you don't like dad for just dropping you and not helping you with anything. But you can still call him dad, he is you dad you know."
Turning to look at Eva with a glare on her face. "Why should I call him Dad when he wouldn't talk to me because I wasn't the boy heir that he wanted from mom. Never mind the fact that I tried to be the boy he wanted."
"ALYX stay on topic. Mercedes almost died last time she got pregnant. How is she supposed to get through it this time? It would be bed rest from the moment of conception and you know that she wouldn't do that." Eva says while turning away and throwing her hands in the air. "By the second day she would be up and ordering everyone around and making sure everyone did everything right."
"Eva, Mercedes will most likely convince Jacob that it will ruin her figure and she won't be able to beat Gina at their games of ‘Who's the better Debutante?’ " Walking away from the window and turning to face Eva, Alyx said with a smirk on her face, "Almost like Russian roulette on a whole knew level."
Eva walked over to Alyx and smacked her on the arm and said "Alyx-Marie Sophia Antoinette Graves enough you may be the older sister but I will still take care to make sure you do not embarrass yourself nor our family name. I love you and I know our parent's are not the kind of parents most would want but they are still our parents." Looking at Alyx and trying to get why draws this grudge out. "Why should it matter about our parents ideas you are a grown woman who lives her own life with her own ideas, and her own challenges that she has over come and working to over come. Come on Alyx grow up and get over it."
" I get it get over my issues and grow up I am working on it. I know what I have going on and I am working on it and my issues with 'Mom' and 'Dad' are mine to deal with if I want to. I just don't want to deal with them they are exactly what I hate in life. Inconsiderate, selfish, Money obsessed, controlling, and assholes. Not to mention they married into more of the same ilk. Oh, why should I want to hang out with them and they’re oh so special families." With a smile she asks, "By the way Eva, how is Zack I thought you two were getting serious. Do you plan on moving in together soon? "
Throwing her arms in the air and grabbing her hair she Eva screamed out, "Alyx you are the most annoying person ever!"
Hearing the door handle jiggle they both looked over to the door in time to see Marie and Jak stumble in drunk and all over each other.
Alyx sat down on the couch and put on her boots, stood back up again and asked " Eva do you mind if I sleep over at your apartment I so don’t want to deal with the drunk and stupid here?"
Eva was staring at Marie and Jak in shock and said "Sure as long as you cook breakfast."
"Thanks Eva, I just have to grab some stuff from my room."
Marie and Jak started to stumble down the hall towards Marie’s room when Eva grabbed Jak’s arm and shook him and said, "You just made the biggest mistake ever. You asshole and you," turning to face Marie she slapped her across the face and smirked at the sound she made, "Marie I hope you know you may have just lost your best friend in the world. She would have done anything for either of the two of you. And you both ruin it by going and doing something as this just for a little sex. Jak you and Alyx had a date tonight yet you canceled by calling the coffeehouse to tell her that you had to work late." Looking between the two of them she turned and started walking to the bathroom to help Alyx pack up some of her stuff. She said, " Neither of you realize just how dangerous it is to piss off a Graves. But if you broke her heart you will."
Jak looked at Marie and started to shake. Thinking that he was laughing she started to join in when Jak started to stand up straight she saw the tears in his eyes. When she saw that she realized she might have lost someone important to her for a quick fuck, she started to cry also. Walking out of her bedroom was Alyx looking at her they saw the strong beautiful woman she was and the fact that they might of hurt her hit them so hard that they collapsed on the couch. When she saw them she looked at them and it was as if she was looking through them as if they weren’t even worthy of her notice anymore. Alyx called out "Eva are you ready to go I have all the important stuff if I keep having to get kicked out of my own apartment I may have to take my name of the list and move back into my old one it’s still open."
Eva walked out of the bathroom saying, " I agree even though I think tomorrow you should get all your stuff and move back. It was bigger and it didn’t have the trash in it. But, I digress I am ready to go. We only have to walk to the elevator and go up to floors and apartment 13605 is Zach and mine’s."
As they walked down the hall you could hear Alyx " WHAT you moved in together and didn’t tell me. I should smack you both."
" Alyx, I was going to tell you when I saw you today but you had to work at two out of your three jobs today."
"Eva, honey, don’t kill me but I worked all three. Of my jobs today."
"ALYX-MARIE SOPHIA ANTOINETTE GRAVES I BETTER NOT OF HEARD YOU RIGHT. Going out with any back up, without any help, without telling anyone, you are in so much trouble. Sly is going to kick your ass and you know he lives next door to us."
"EVA"
Both Eva and Alyx were walking side by side on their way to the elevator with small smiles on their faces.

Note to reader: Songs used are the property of Opeth the band songs are off the album DAMNATION. Songs used in scene are Death Whispered a Lullaby, Hope Leaves, and Closure.

Three Poems

Someday...
Someday I will be an artist
Someday I will have a house
Someday I will have a husband
Someday I will own a horse
Someday I will be loved
Someday it will be okay to be me.

Seasons
Seasons Change
Autumn Colors Bright
Leaves Falling
Red, Orange, an Brown
Transtitioning Seasons

A Single Dance
Life is like a single dance,
Long awaited but short lived,
Passion filled within the movements,
Sadness coming all around at the close.

HIM
He is Passion
Invoked
Honor within
My Knight
Brave as a
Dragon's Conqueror
Deep as a
Underground Cavern

I crave
His Love
But it is
Not mine but
Theirs
My confidant and
My Enemy are
His Loves
While he is theirs

SECRET EXCHANGE
Mirror Images
Above and Below
Bodies Intertwined

Sensual Touches
Devoted Glances
Radiant Visages

Wistful Reflection
Heartsick Faces
Averse Looks

Little World
Collapsed
Reality Drawn in

Grasped at Seconds
Turned Away
Their Place Destroyed

COLD HEARTED WOMAN
Sitting on Her
Throne Made of
Coldness and
Hatred.

A woman like an
Ice Queen
Indifferent to
Pain and Suffering.

A glacial heart in an
Empty shell of a woman
Emotionless in her ways like an
Empty Prison cell.

Frigid and Frozen
To her domain
Like the rock of Gibraltar
Formidable and unyielding.

The Human Code of Conduct

Manners, patience, and passion are my guidelines to life. Your life is your choice of decisions, guidelies, and mistakes. Manners help you instill order and calm, and patience leaves you withe the room to make things to go smoother, and passion makes you excel in anything you try to do. Without them your life will be nowhere near what you want it to be.

You will always need to be polite and courteous to other people. Even if you do not get along with someone you should try to be polite and courteous. It shows you are the better person. Being rude and abrupt will affect the way that people think and feel about you. Swearing is always an impolite and improper thing to do. No one wil treat you correctly if you do not treat them correctly to begin with. Even if someone does not treat you correctly you should always be the better person and treat them correctly. Being polite and courteous shows that you are a person who is worth the time commited to working with and getting to know.

If things go wrong you need to sit down and work it out. Taking the time to do it right the first time means not having to do it over. Patience in taking the time to work with other people on a project means more opinions and more people to spread the work out. Working with people you do not like nor agree with is something everyone has to deal with. If you take the time to work with them now and get the job done correctly you will not have to do the job a second time. You may have to compromise but that is all part of working with someone else. Cliques do not end in high school they are everywhere. You will not always be liker by the people at your job or in your community. You will not always like everyone, or be like by everyone: it is a fact of life. Working with that person you do not like is a testament to your patience and your commitment to what you are doing. If you do not take the time to complete the task right the first time, you will just have to work with them that much longer.

Passion for whatever you do makes you work to complete your task with perfection in mind. Without your passion for what you are doing the task is not vital nor is it interesting to you. It makes you take the chance of ending up hating what you are doing. Passion without means nor want to get the job done does not do you any favors. Planning what you want to do with your passion helps you to know how you are going to make that passion into a successful venture into the world. Passion is a driving force in life use it well.

No matter what road you go down in life you should do so with these tools: manners to present you in the best possible light, patience to help you deal with the ups and downs of that road, and passion to love what you choose to do with your life.

Journal 1
PS. These are journals I wrote on live journal where I bitch alot.
Yeah so this is me talkin to my lovely friends about some serious issues. Like for one Andrew you dumb ass why do you keep sending Ash emails when she don't want to talk to you and why won't you at least reply to mine. Two Mike, Ash, and I had this conversation at lunch on Friday about all the people we know who like or have liked Mike me and Ash being some of them. And we talked about the fact that he started going out with Deana because on the last day of school because she knew that him being a senior meant that if he had said no then she wouldn't have to worry about seeing him again. And he asked me why I did't say anything to him at the time. I replied to him by saying that I knew that I would see him again so I didn't want there to be an akwardness. Then I asked him what he would have said if I had asked him out. He said I really don't know. Lunch was kinda akward after that. I really like Mike alot I like one guy alot right now (Mike), Kinda like another(Jake), and find one interestin'(nonya). The only guy I am interested in with more than just gut ohh he is hot ideas is Mike he makes me giggle the only other thing that makes me giggle is C and that doesn't count. I miss when we used to hang out all the time just Mike, Ash ,and I sometimes other people too. Thom you are one of the greatest guys to be friends with because you are an interesting, intreging(not spelt right), and intelligent guy. I love you to pieces. Spork stabbing and all. Rei and Eric love you both you are two unique individuals who definitly deserve each other hurt each other and I will whip both your butts. Andrew I love you you are my brother and a good friend but you need to relize(not spelt right) that ash and you both should not have to deal with the drama your father causes. Talk to each other be friends but both of you need to move on. Don't cry because it's over smile because it happened. Ash I love you but you cause drama without even meaning to. You are a great friend love with all your heart but learn to let go before it breaks you to so many pieces that you can't fix it. Britt you can be the biggest bitch ever but you can also be the best friend possible. Be the friend more it will help you later on. Kayla I think you are a person with a great sense of humor continue trying to keep the group from killing each other. Sam you are interesting person. I love the way you manage to change in so many ways without ever changing at all. Dani you are a great artist with a great personality never change you are the best. Spikess you are a very interesting person with many different facets to you living is interesting when reading your entries. arrmaitee jr certainly never boring when reading your entries also. Never change if you did life would get very boring.
To all of you Drink Drink Drink Water Sleep Sleep Sleep ALONE

Post/ Journal 1
I have always wanted to design my own house. Make it so that it fits in with me. Not me making me fit with the house. I think that to design my own house would be fun, interesting, a challenge to my brain & a chance to gain knew knowledge. I would have to learn many things. But that would be why it would so interesting and challenging to the brain. I find that if you want something bad enough you can and will find a way. I believe that I would build a house from my own design would be worth the time, money, and the hardships. It is worth it to me because of the fact that I want to build something from my own plans. Mold something from the beginning shape it in my mind, on paper, on the computer, and then finally in real life. The ability to see something come to life before my eyes. To be able to touch it, see it, and Live in it. It would become my baby something nurtured from a seed in my brain to fruitation in a real live house in front of my eyes. Something that will be hard to get rid of. A chance of something that unlike a book or a movie or even a discovery in sometime they will be forgotten. It is something that will last longer that you could dream of as long as it is taken care of it will be there. It is something that will outlast passion. A longer lasting thing is not found.